


Surrender in the dark  time

by Avaron (tlanon)



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Anime)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-07-15
Updated: 2002-07-15
Packaged: 2019-11-07 15:47:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17963459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tlanon/pseuds/Avaron
Summary: This was yet another Ash/Gary fic I wrote under the avaron name.





	Surrender in the dark  time

**Author's Note:**

> First comments are screened and will never be read so please don't leave any. I don't even log into this account except when I'm adding older works simply so anyone who may be interested in them may read them.
> 
> I do not edit these fics this is simply archiving so all original mistakes are preserved Be Warned.
> 
> This fic has been backdated as close to its original publication date as I can get. Like all avaron fics the original date is lost defaulted to 7/15/2002

Surrender in the Dark Time

By Avaron

Ash turned over to stare at the clock on his bedside table. "1:00 AM great." He said softly to himself as he glanced over at Pikachu who was sleeping in the costume Pokemon bed designed by Brock. ‘Used to be,’ he thought sadly. ‘When I couldn’t sleep Pikachu would sit up with me but it’s been along time since he can go without a full nights sleep.’ That thought saddened him he loved all his Pokemon dearly but Pikachu had always held a special place in his heart. Shaking that thought away both Brock and Professor Sketchit had said that pikachu still had a few years left if he took it easy and avoided battling so it wasn’t time to start preparing for good bye yet. ‘But it won’t be any easier when it is time.’ He thought sadly and decided he needed to do something and quietly got out of bed.

Glancing around the room he smiled fondly. Even though this house was much larger than his old one, it still looked the same his mom ever practical had insisted they not buy all new furniture since the old stuff was still in great shape. He turned to look out the window and made a decision. ‘I’ll go out and look at the stars.’ He quickly shed his pajama bottoms and dressed in jeans and a T-shirt. Padding barefoot down the stairs grabbing his hat as he went once downstairs he laced up a pair of hiking boots and pulled on the leather jacket Misty had given him for his eighteenth birthday. Writing a quick note for his mother and grabbing one pokeball off the shelf just in case even though Pallet was less wild now there were still occasional wild Pokemon attacks. ‘Best to be prepared.’ He thought as he closed and locked the front door behind him.

He glanced up at the moon as he turned off down a street some impulse making him long to see his childhood home again. ‘Guess I just need to see how it’s changed now that we are gone.’ He thought with a bit of nostagolic longing. He finally reached it and frowned to see it had been painted some hideous yellow color. ‘I guess the old saying is true you can’t go home again.’ He sighed at that thought. ‘I don’t really have a home.’ He thought sadly all his friends had homes.

Misty was currently living with a lawyer who had recently asked her to marry him. ‘She certainly was happy when she called to tell me about it.’ He thought with an affectionate smile. He knew Misty was looking forward to being an honest woman finally after a few disastrous boyfriends she had finally found the one she wanted to spend her life with.

He still remembered the time she said to him over one two many beers. "I can’t believe Brock got married first I thought he’d be a bachelor forever." Privately Ash had agreed and Brock’s wife of three years wasn’t what he’d have pictured Brock settling down with. She wasn’t any great beauty in fact she was rather plain. ‘But the first time I talked to her I saw what he saw.’ He smiled remembering the bold and yet still pleasant woman who had such a kind heart.

He felt an ache in his chest. ‘They have homes I just have a place I stay when I come to visit mom.’ He didn’t know why that made him so sad after all he’d chosen this life. ‘There have been plenty of offers to settle down but I just can’t I have to be out there living the life I’ve chosen but I don’t want to be alone anymore.’ He thought sadly but he didn’t know if he would ever find someone to share it with.

He noticed absent mindedly that he was heading down a familiar path that leads to the river. ‘The place I always ran when I was little and needed to get away from it all.’ Ash thought with the by now familiar mixture of longing and fond memories. He paused as he saw someone sitting on the rocks. He was about to turn back when a Houndoom raised it’s head to look at him warily and made a soft growl to alert it’s master.

Ash wasn’t really surprised to see Gary Oak turn to face him. ‘All us kids played here declaring we would be Pokemon masters someday.’ He smiled at the memory. ‘It’s fitting the only two that made it meet up here tonight.’ He thought with wry amusement. He saw Gary watching him impassively. "So you couldn’t sleep either?"

Gary turned to look back over the water. "I’m going to be an uncle May found out tonight she’s going to be a mother." He saw Ash start. "Try to act surprised when she calls tomorrow she’d kill me if she knew I told you." He glanced out over the water. "So tell me Ash do you believe in fate?"

Ash paused and stared Gary normally insulted him or at most was only mildly civil that question had come totally out of left field. "I don’t know sometimes I suppose I do and other times I don’t." He said calmly wondering what had brought that question up.

"I mean I set there watching my parents hug her and tell her she’ll be a great mother and it just hit me I’m alone." he turned to regard Ash. "I mean you were lucky you had friends on your journey I had an entourage." He sighed. "I was an idiot I even pushed them away to travel alone after I lost thinking they were a distraction." He gestured toward the bank beside him.

"It worked your one of the greatest trainers alive." Ash said taking Gary up on the invitation to sit down. He felt the slightly damp grass threw his jeans but decided against complaining. "I mean your the only trainer who beats me fifty percent of the time." He expected the old bravado to resurface to see his rival again but only he got was a sad look.

"I’m tired of it Ash not the Pokemon training but the constant loneliness." He said with a hitch in his throat. "When my Umbreon died I lost my best friend in the world." He leaned a hand down to stroke the head of the Houndoom at his feet. "If it wasn’t for Leopold here I’d probably have given up on training and gone into research sooner."

Ash was frozen. "Your giving up on training?" He winced it sounded like an accusation but he was off balance Gary had voiced the same concerns he had. "I mean why your to good a trainer to give it up."

Gary smiled slightly. "That’s what I’m sitting here thinking about thinking maybe I can find a place for myself there." He paused and glanced out over the water. "You want to know what’s really pathetic I don’t want to fight anymore I always loved our arguments cause someone noticed me."

"People notice you all the time." Ash said seeing Gary shake his head no. "Oh so those girls at the matches wearing holding the signs saying I want to have your baby Gary Oak don’t notice you." He watched the other man choke out a bitter laugh.

"They don’t see me as a person I’m a sex symbol same as you no one really notices you either." He glanced at Ash and didn’t say anything more just stared. "Why are you out here Ash?"

"I’m looking for home." Ash said without the slightest hesitation even though it did sound rather strange to hear himself. "I just noticed tonight I don’t have a home; I mean all I have are places I visit." He met Gary’s eyes and saw understanding and a similar feeling. "But you’d know all about that wouldn’t you since you were just talking about it?" He saw Gary smile slightly.

Ash felt a rather strange impulse to kiss the other man who’s features were only barely visible in the fading moonlight as the moon moved beyond the trees. Normally such an impulse would have been rejected out of hand but in these dark times before dawn it seemed completely natural. He hesitantly placed his lips against Gary’s and then pulled back quickly. He braced himself for a blow that never came the look on Gary’s face was intense but not angry.

Ash opened his mouth to explain to find some excuse for his lapse but before he could Gary leaned in and placed a firm but gentle kiss on his lips. Ash lost it then he didn’t care what the morning brought he just wanted some connection for the night a home if even for one night. He felt his back hitting the grass and a solid weight settling over him. Gary pulled back and looked down at him with longing filling his eyes. Ash felt all self control slip away as he pulled the other man back down for another kiss.

Ash fumbled with the other man’s clothing and his own it was far from graceful nor was it very long but it accomplished what it needed to it allowed them to release their burdens and take comfort in each other. "Hey Gary in answer to your question earlier." Ash said as he felt the other man’s cheek pressed against his bare chest. "After this I do believe in fate." His only answer was a contented sigh from the other man and soon he too was drifting off to sleep.

Ash woke up to someone shaking him he looked up to find Gary half dressed pointing at the blue sky. "Hurry up and get dressed Ash this isn’t exactly a private room." He shook his head. "Houndoom has been chasing folks off but they will come looking for the wild Pokemon eventually."

The previous night came back to him in a flash and he hurried to dress. "Hey Gary um about last night shouldn’t we like talk or something?" He saw Gary stiffen and suddenly felt uncomfortable at the unreadable look in Gary’s eyes.

"It didn’t mean anything we were just lonely." Gary said calmly. "We just won’t talk about it." With that he whistled for Houndoom and headed off at a trot. Ash watched him go wondering why he suddenly felt so alone again.

Delia Ketchum watched her son arrive with a sad look on his face that failed to brighten when Pikachu came bounding up to him. She watched him excuse himself to take a shower and saw the crest fallen expression on the little rodent. "Don’t worry Pikachu he’s just tired he was out all night after all." She saw the little rodent brighten.

Ash stood in the spray feeling the water flowing down his back. ‘How dare he decide for me.’ He thought angrily and then mellowed briefly. ‘Why the hell am I so worked up over something that should never have happened in the first place.’ He thought darkly. He leaned his head against the cool tiles and sighed memories of the night flitting threw his mind. ‘It’s not what he would have expected after waiting so long but it had been good.’ Ash stood upright and got water in his eyes shaking his head he grabbed the rag and wiped them out. Once the stinging subsided he repeated his last thought to himself. ‘I have wanted it for years he realized every time they went up against each other they had danced around it.’

"A dance that would have gone on if it wasn’t so dark and both of us so lonely." He thought back on the years how once the bitterness of their childhood rivalry had faded they had formed an almost friendship that was made up entirely out of arguments. ‘What did he say I noticed him as a person just like he noticed me.’

Ash jumped out of the shower switching off the water. ‘I need to talk to him.’ He thought it didn’t matter rather Gary believed it was a mistake or not he needed to talk it out for his own reasons. Dressing quickly in the same clothes he’d discarded he ran down the stairs. "Pikachu lets go Mom I’ll be back soon I need to talk to someone." He saw her nod slightly in shock as he scooped up Pikachu and was out the door.

He arrived at the Oak residence to learn from a flustered May that Gary had been in that morning and packed. He congratulated her as he was running out the door in the direction she indicated not even remembering that she hadn’t told him yet.

He finally caught up with Gary outside of town the other man was leaning against an Oak tree watching him approach. "Couldn’t you have picked a spot closer to town to stop?" Ash asked watching Gary flinch. "We need to talk."

Gary nodded he could tell from Ash’s tone it wasn’t a question. "Alright I’ll start Ash why did you follow me out here?" He asked it in a quiet voice something in it that Ash thought sounded either like hope or dread or maybe even both.

"I don’t know." Ash said calmly. "I just know I need to talk about what happened I mean we’ve been dancing around it for years." He noticed Gary gave no retort. Ash fumbled last night it had been so much easier to talk. ‘Cause it was dark and no daylight to make it real.’ He thought and then had the answer. "So now in daylight I’m asking you are we going to keep dancing the same old thing or are we going to change the dance."

Gary answered him with a surprisingly cool tone. "Are you trying to say you think we are in love after one night?" He said knowing even Ash could read the sarcasm in that one.

"No but I’m saying in the light of day I want to give it a shot." Ash said calmly. "I don’t know if it’ll work or it’s the worst mistake of our lives." He paused. "But I know I want to see if my home is with you or not." He was shocked when Gary kissed him.

Pikachu screeched in shock until Leopold the Houndoom that had been behind the tree explained it all to him. "Pika kachu" the little rodent said meaning he had a headache.

The End..

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading


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